Looked down from a broken sky
Traced out by the city lights
My world from a mile high
Best seat in the house tonight
Touched down on the cold black tile
Hold on for the sudden stop
Breath in the familiar shock
Of confusion and chaos
Are those people going somewhere?
Why have I never cared?
Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see
Everything that I keep missing
Give me your love for humanity
Give me your arms for the broken hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach
Give me your heart for the once forgotten
Give me your eyes so I can see
Step out on a busy street
See a girl and our eyes meet
Does her best to smile at me
To hide whats underneath
Theres a man just to her right
Black suit and a bright red tie
To ashamed to tell his wife
He's out of work
He's buying time
Are those people going somewhere?
Why have I never cared?
Ive Been there a million times
A couple of million eyes
Just moving past me by
I swear I never thought that I was wrong
Well I want a second glance
So give me a second chance
To see the way you see the people all alone
What would the world look like if we saw it with God's eyes?
What would our actions look like if we saw this world with God's eyes?
What would we think if we saw ourselves with God's eyes?
Monday, June 30, 2008
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Africa.
I just had lunch with my friend that I've known longer then anyone else in this world (except my family).
And I left with this thought. "I have to go back to Africa." Like...soon.
I could not tell you the reasons I decided to go to Africa a year ago. I was sitting in asuyl and it was about the 7th time they'd been talking about the Africa trip and right then and there I decided I was going. Never really hit me before that one night. I decided that moment and never questioned it again. Best decision I've ever made...
So I went, I experienced, I learned, I got pissed off at America, and now here I am. Needing more. I don't know how much of this desire is God knowing its what I need, or how much is me. But I like to think it's a nice combination. I pray this isn't just me. But honestly I don't see how it can be. The simple act of talking about my experiences (past or future) leaves me speechless. I doubt anyone has heard me talk about Africa for more then 5 minutes at a time because I can't. For me it was something so indescribable that trying to describe it leaves me frustrated. So I just don't.
I had an opportunity presented to me to go back. Well, one that I actually want to take. The reason I was presented with this opportunity in itself is confusing and seems a little manufactured. (manufactured by the Big guy of course)
Then reality sets in. I should finish school first. I should take responsibilties that I have. But honestly, I don't want to. Haha, that sounds immature and I'm not running away from the fact that maybe it is. But I don't care. I don't feel any need to finish school before I go and experience more of my life in this stage. I'm not afraid of growing up, when I feel like I need to. I just don't feel like thats where I am right now. I cannot wait for the day I meet the man I get to marry and have little, loved, and adored munchkins, but I know once that day comes that will become my passion. And I'll throw the nursing thing in there too. That's what I look forward to most in life. But my timing for that is not right now. When I have a reason to sit still I will be the most still person you know. But for the last year or so nothing has given me this feeling. I need to go now. I need to follow my desires while I'm able to. I don't believe that I have them for no reason at all. And the things that I should be desiring right now I'm not desiring at all, besides Will of course.
I have to go to church. But I vented.....I was going to write things actually about Africa. I feel like I need to defend my wants. Like I need to explain my willingness to be irrational and just find 5k to go live on another continent for 3 months. Maybe I do, maybe I don't....that's what I'm figuring out.
God is Love.
Rev Run.
And I left with this thought. "I have to go back to Africa." Like...soon.
I could not tell you the reasons I decided to go to Africa a year ago. I was sitting in asuyl and it was about the 7th time they'd been talking about the Africa trip and right then and there I decided I was going. Never really hit me before that one night. I decided that moment and never questioned it again. Best decision I've ever made...
So I went, I experienced, I learned, I got pissed off at America, and now here I am. Needing more. I don't know how much of this desire is God knowing its what I need, or how much is me. But I like to think it's a nice combination. I pray this isn't just me. But honestly I don't see how it can be. The simple act of talking about my experiences (past or future) leaves me speechless. I doubt anyone has heard me talk about Africa for more then 5 minutes at a time because I can't. For me it was something so indescribable that trying to describe it leaves me frustrated. So I just don't.
I had an opportunity presented to me to go back. Well, one that I actually want to take. The reason I was presented with this opportunity in itself is confusing and seems a little manufactured. (manufactured by the Big guy of course)
Then reality sets in. I should finish school first. I should take responsibilties that I have. But honestly, I don't want to. Haha, that sounds immature and I'm not running away from the fact that maybe it is. But I don't care. I don't feel any need to finish school before I go and experience more of my life in this stage. I'm not afraid of growing up, when I feel like I need to. I just don't feel like thats where I am right now. I cannot wait for the day I meet the man I get to marry and have little, loved, and adored munchkins, but I know once that day comes that will become my passion. And I'll throw the nursing thing in there too. That's what I look forward to most in life. But my timing for that is not right now. When I have a reason to sit still I will be the most still person you know. But for the last year or so nothing has given me this feeling. I need to go now. I need to follow my desires while I'm able to. I don't believe that I have them for no reason at all. And the things that I should be desiring right now I'm not desiring at all, besides Will of course.
I have to go to church. But I vented.....I was going to write things actually about Africa. I feel like I need to defend my wants. Like I need to explain my willingness to be irrational and just find 5k to go live on another continent for 3 months. Maybe I do, maybe I don't....that's what I'm figuring out.
God is Love.
Rev Run.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Blogging just to blog
So I keep being bothered to blog.
So here I am.
Blogging is going to be hard for me. I'm fine with getting my thoughts out, but writing them seems so final. I love serious conversations, stimulating thoughts and more so stimulating friendships. But putting them in ink....thats my problem. My thoughts change often, and by often I mean about every 5-10 minutes. Big things stay the same, but my rationales and emotions fluctuate more then Oprah's weight.
So my first topic will be about how much I love my friends. I love my friends. I think they are basically perfect.....(don't take that sentence too literally) For the first time in life I have friends that challenge me, friends that would rather talk for 20 minutes about Jesus than other people. And by that I mean talking negatively about other people to make ourselves feel better. I know without a doubt that every single person I associate myself with on a regular basis has love as their priority in life. A love that stems from knowing how Jesus lived and a passion for figuring out how the crap he did it. All along knowing that we will never come even close to achieving that, yet we never stop trying.
This is a good place to be. It's a blessing to be around. Unspoken genuine concern for one another. Unspoken admiration, no matter how many times we mess up. Accepting each other exactly how we come, but still expecting greatness.
Here's the challenge:
When do we take advantage of these friendships? Being in each others lives comes with demands. I think that we are supposed to grow others and expect to allow them to grow us. (is that proper english, ah well...) But accepting criticism is never easy. I want to learn how to give it gracefully, and how to take it without wanting to punch that person in the face. That's it.
I'm super tired and am going to go play word scramble before I go to bed. My thoughts feel scrambled right now so I may do well....Sorry if this post didn't make any sense but the pressure was on to write...more to come I hope. (unless no one comments then I'm never writing again)
~julie~
So here I am.
Blogging is going to be hard for me. I'm fine with getting my thoughts out, but writing them seems so final. I love serious conversations, stimulating thoughts and more so stimulating friendships. But putting them in ink....thats my problem. My thoughts change often, and by often I mean about every 5-10 minutes. Big things stay the same, but my rationales and emotions fluctuate more then Oprah's weight.
So my first topic will be about how much I love my friends. I love my friends. I think they are basically perfect.....(don't take that sentence too literally) For the first time in life I have friends that challenge me, friends that would rather talk for 20 minutes about Jesus than other people. And by that I mean talking negatively about other people to make ourselves feel better. I know without a doubt that every single person I associate myself with on a regular basis has love as their priority in life. A love that stems from knowing how Jesus lived and a passion for figuring out how the crap he did it. All along knowing that we will never come even close to achieving that, yet we never stop trying.
This is a good place to be. It's a blessing to be around. Unspoken genuine concern for one another. Unspoken admiration, no matter how many times we mess up. Accepting each other exactly how we come, but still expecting greatness.
Here's the challenge:
When do we take advantage of these friendships? Being in each others lives comes with demands. I think that we are supposed to grow others and expect to allow them to grow us. (is that proper english, ah well...) But accepting criticism is never easy. I want to learn how to give it gracefully, and how to take it without wanting to punch that person in the face. That's it.
I'm super tired and am going to go play word scramble before I go to bed. My thoughts feel scrambled right now so I may do well....Sorry if this post didn't make any sense but the pressure was on to write...more to come I hope. (unless no one comments then I'm never writing again)
~julie~
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